I've been trying to better myself lately -- not be as negative, not drink as much, but so far, no dice. For instance, Thursday night I went out with J.Mo and his BF. We drank far too much than planned, to the point that J.Mo came back with me to my place with a six-pack of Lager at 2:30 am. I proceeded to drunk e-mail Ruby in an attempt to make plans for an upcoming trip to NYC I have in two weeks.

So, as of last night, I am not drinking again until April 3, when I hit NYC after my one-day conference uptown. Let's see if I stick to this resolution. I think writing it down is the first step.

Insofar as I've tried to be a better person, I'm trying not to dwell on what annoys me about people and not be bitter and complain. Still, there is one student right now who is truly grating on my attempt at bringing back good karma. I can't deal with it. Also, I'm annoyed with people who don't write or call or e-mail me back. I feel as if things I put out go into some communication void. It's enough to make me misanthropic yet again. But I'm not bitter, I swear.

I'm not even going to go into the catastrophe that is wedding planning. At this point, it seems like the future husband and I are being told to plan our own engagement party. Fuck that, I don't even really want one. I have enoug to worry about with the real event to not have to deal with the engagement party.

And finally, I cannot deal with the subway lately. The past week I was stuck on a car that smelled like shit (I'm talking beyond homeless person stench), a smell which only improved when the offender LIT A FUCKING CIGARETTE on the train.

Now, I know I'm a bit of a hardcore non-smoker, but it's just fucking rude to light up on public transportation, even in the subway station. I can understand the bitching and moaning about smoking bans in bars, but I should be able to commute to work without smelling like an ashtray. That being said, the smell of burning tobacco is far more pleasant than the stench of human feces.

The next day I was taking the train home and walked on to be greeted by a man passed out, with snot and drool pouring from his mouth and nose. This was at 3 in the afternoon. I swear, shit was never this nasty in NYC.

So, that's what I've been saving up the past week. Besides all this, I'm still in a pretty decent mood.